Lindy Low LeCoq

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries 4 ~

Posted on October 6, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

The victim triangle (aka drama triangle) helped me come to terms with what had happened. In my desire to help (rescue) her, I hooked myself into her drama. While I started out as the rescuer, her swift natural reaction was to punish (persecute) me. Suddenly, I was the victim — which is the tragedy of becoming hooked into this dysfunctional dynamic. **“No matter where we may start out on the triangle, victim is where we end up….” (Lynn Forest)*

When I was able to see and accept my part in our dysfunctional relationship, I could begin to extract myself mentally, emotionally and spiritually. A hard climb, but worth it. Simply stated, the more I resist the impulse to rescue others, the stronger they become and the more healthy our relationship will be.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

I highly recommend this article to those who want to learn more about the victim triangle: * http://www.lynneforrest.com/articles/2008/06/the-faces-of-victim/

Posted in Being, weekly photo challenge | Tagged analysis, postaday, Tuesday Two by Two, weekly photo challenge | Leave a comment

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries – 3 ~

Posted on October 5, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

I was like a ripe old artichoke, with outer leaves showing the effects of age and experience — defense systems and protective devices intact. Yet, when pierced to the core with words and actions, the wound was painful — and invisible. In order to heal, I needed to peel away the leaves around the wound, tend to the damage, and learn about myself from the experience.

As I stripped off each layer, my emotions continued to swirl, from shock and anger to a deep sadness. I knew I had transgressed her boundaries, and must take full responsibility for it — no excuses, no justification — just accept my flaw.

That required identifying and owning the flaw in myself, and answering honestly the hardest question: When I could have remained out of it, said and done nothing, why did I step in? What characteristic in me prompted my behavior?

To find the answer, I had to dig deep.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

Posted in Being, weekly photo challenge | Tagged being, grace, postaday, weekly photo challenge | Leave a comment

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries 2 ~

Posted on October 4, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

Three ways culture, society and family keep us ‘in line’ are betrayal, shame and abandonment (Mario Martinez). After I crossed her personal boundaries, she shamed me, then abandoned me for several months. I don’t know if she also denounced me.

At the time, I felt as though she had discarded me — like clothing that no longer fit her needs — tossed onto the rag heap, like so many other imperfect people.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

Posted in Being, weekly photo challenge | Tagged being, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 2 Comments

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries ~

Posted on October 3, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

This week’s photo challenge invites us to explore the concept of Boundaries. In the past year I violated the personal boundaries of someone I love very much. Her reaction to my mistake turned into an equally egregious transgression of my boundaries. In order to restore balance in my life, I reevaluated and redefined my own boundaries — all invisible on the surface — but there nonetheless.

Counselors and therapists often use metaphors to describe mental, emotional and spiritual concepts that are easier to understand using a physical or symbolic representation. Peeling off layers of an onion, for example, is often used to explain the process of self-discovery required to find inner strength and peace.

In my posts this week I will explore the topic of emotional boundaries. Since it is an invisible periphery, the images used are meant to provide a metaphorical glimpse under the surface of being.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

Posted in Being, weekly photo challenge | Tagged being, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 7 Comments

~ Friday Flyers – Goldfinch on the Wing ~ WPC – Change 7 ~

Posted on October 2, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

American Goldfinch are migrating through our region now. They gather in trees and shrubs, calling out to brothers and sisters still on the wing. In raucous harmony they announce; “plenty of room here, and good eats too!”

As the lovely blossoms of coneflowers and rudbeckia fade, it is such a pleasure to see these colorful birds feeding on their seeds.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in birds, flowers, landscape gardening, nature, ornithology, outdoors, pacific northwest, weekly photo challenge | Tagged birds, Friday Flyers, landscape gardening, nature, outdoors, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 4 Comments

~ Jello one week after being hit on a highway by a truck ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Change 6 ~

Posted on October 1, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

*angels were everywhere

*the young man who slammed on the brakes in his big utility truck, causing damage to the vehicle, but minimizing the impact on Jello,

*the runner who saw it happen and came to my side asking only, “how can I help you?”

*the resort owner, Darrell, who called the La Pine Animal Hospital, gave us directions, told them we were on the way and said “you can stay as long as you need to — on me.”

*Dr. ‘Gordon’ and staff, who provided immediate care and reparative surgery to the gaping wound on Jell0’s right side, and reattached her nose cartilage to her upper jaw.

they all loved her immediately — stepped up to save her

~ angels ~ people of exemplary conduct and virtue ~

how do you thank your angels?

with gentle touch
soft words of comfort
holding life close
with a promise
we can do this

and we are
almost there

*With special thanks to Creighton, Kate, judi, Carolyn and all who have provided special care, thoughts and love to Jello and me as we have navigated this trauma.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in dogs, weekly photo challenge | Tagged dogs, grace, love, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 5 Comments

~ Wordless Wednesday + WPC ~ Change 5 ~

Posted on September 30, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in nature, outdoors, travel, weekly photo challenge, Wordless Wednesday | Tagged nature, outdoors, postaday, travel, weekly photo challenge, Wordless Wednesday | 1 Comment

~ Tuesday Two by Two & WPC ~ Change 4 ~

Posted on September 29, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

Left photo taken July, 2012 with lupine in full bloom on a sunny afternoon.

Right photo taken September, 2015 with mist rising at daybreak.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in nature, outdoors, pacific northwest, weekly photo challenge | Tagged nature, outdoors, postaday, Tuesday Two by Two, weekly photo challenge | 1 Comment

~ Monochrome Monday & WPC ~ Change 3 ~

Posted on September 28, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

A week ago, Creighton and I drove from Tahoe City to the summit of Willamette Pass in Oregon. We spent the night at a quiet RV/Cabin resort by Crescent Creek. It was so peaceful and we were tired, so we decided to stay another day and night.

On Wednesday morning, Jello and I took a long walk through the damp meadow and underbrush by the creek. One moment she was near me, the next she was gone, and then I heard the slamming of brakes on the highway, and a beagle cry. It is a miracle she survived. My faith in angels is stronger than ever. We are home and Jello is mending. Please don’t criticize me for allowing her off lead — I don’t need sermons. Instead of blame, I ask that you send Jello your healing rieki (universal life energy) for a full recovery. Thank you.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in dogs, nature, outdoors, pacific northwest, weekly photo challenge | Tagged dogs, Monochrome Monday, nature, outdoors, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 1 Comment

~ First Light at Lake Tahoe ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Change 2 ~

Posted on September 27, 2015 by Lindy Le Coq

“The moment of change is the only poem.” Adrienne Rich

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Posted in nature, outdoors, weekly photo challenge | Tagged nature, outdoors, postaday, weekly photo challenge | 1 Comment

Lindy Low LeCoq

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries 4 ~

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries – 3 ~

As I stripped off each layer, my emotions continued to swirl, from shock and anger to a deep sadness. I knew I had transgressed her boundaries, and must take full responsibility for it — no excuses, no justification — just accept my flaw.

That required identifying and owning the flaw in myself, and answering honestly the hardest question: When I could have remained out of it, said and done nothing, why did I step in? What characteristic in me prompted my behavior?

To find the answer, I had to dig deep.

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries 2 ~

Three ways culture, society and family keep us ‘in line’ are betrayal, shame and abandonment (Mario Martinez). After I crossed her personal boundaries, she shamed me, then abandoned me for several months. I don’t know if she also denounced me.

At the time, I felt as though she had discarded me — like clothing that no longer fit her needs — tossed onto the rag heap, like so many other imperfect people.

~ Under the Skin of Life ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Boundaries ~

~ Friday Flyers – Goldfinch on the Wing ~ WPC – Change 7 ~

American Goldfinch are migrating through our region now. They gather in trees and shrubs, calling out to brothers and sisters still on the wing. In raucous harmony they announce; “plenty of room here, and good eats too!”

As the lovely blossoms of coneflowers and rudbeckia fade, it is such a pleasure to see these colorful birds feeding on their seeds.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

~ Jello one week after being hit on a highway by a truck ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Change 6 ~

*angels were everywhere

*the young man who slammed on the brakes in his big utility truck, causing damage to the vehicle, but minimizing the impact on Jello,

*the runner who saw it happen and came to my side asking only, “how can I help you?”

*the resort owner, Darrell, who called the La Pine Animal Hospital, gave us directions, told them we were on the way and said “you can stay as long as you need to — on me.”

*Dr. ‘Gordon’ and staff, who provided immediate care and reparative surgery to the gaping wound on Jell0’s right side, and reattached her nose cartilage to her upper jaw.

they all loved her immediately — stepped up to save her

~ angels ~ people of exemplary conduct and virtue ~

how do you thank your angels?

with gentle touch
soft words of comfort
holding life close
with a promise
we can do this

and we are
almost there

*With special thanks to Creighton, Kate, judi, Carolyn and all who have provided special care, thoughts and love to Jello and me as we have navigated this trauma.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

~ Wordless Wednesday + WPC ~ Change 5 ~

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

~ Tuesday Two by Two & WPC ~ Change 4 ~

Left photo taken July, 2012 with lupine in full bloom on a sunny afternoon.

Right photo taken September, 2015 with mist rising at daybreak.

~ Monochrome Monday & WPC ~ Change 3 ~

A week ago, Creighton and I drove from Tahoe City to the summit of Willamette Pass in Oregon. We spent the night at a quiet RV/Cabin resort by Crescent Creek. It was so peaceful and we were tired, so we decided to stay another day and night.

~ First Light at Lake Tahoe ~ Weekly Photo Challenge ~ Change 2 ~

“The moment of change is the only poem.” Adrienne Rich

Favorite Photos

Our Condo at The Breakers #128 ~ click on any photo to access full screen .

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Boundaries.”

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As I stripped off each layer, my emotions continued to swirl, from shock and anger to a deep sadness. I knew I had transgressed her boundaries, and must take full responsibility for it — no excuses, no justification — just accept my flaw.

That required identifying and owning the flaw in myself, and answering honestly the hardest question: When I could have remained out of it, said and done nothing, why did I step in? What characteristic in me prompted my behavior?

To find the answer, I had to dig deep.

Share this:

Three ways culture, society and family keep us ‘in line’ are betrayal, shame and abandonment (Mario Martinez). After I crossed her personal boundaries, she shamed me, then abandoned me for several months. I don’t know if she also denounced me.

At the time, I felt as though she had discarded me — like clothing that no longer fit her needs — tossed onto the rag heap, like so many other imperfect people.

Share this:

Share this:

American Goldfinch are migrating through our region now. They gather in trees and shrubs, calling out to brothers and sisters still on the wing. In raucous harmony they announce; “plenty of room here, and good eats too!”

As the lovely blossoms of coneflowers and rudbeckia fade, it is such a pleasure to see these colorful birds feeding on their seeds.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Share this:

*angels were everywhere

*the young man who slammed on the brakes in his big utility truck, causing damage to the vehicle, but minimizing the impact on Jello,

*the runner who saw it happen and came to my side asking only, “how can I help you?”

*the resort owner, Darrell, who called the La Pine Animal Hospital, gave us directions, told them we were on the way and said “you can stay as long as you need to — on me.”

*Dr. ‘Gordon’ and staff, who provided immediate care and reparative surgery to the gaping wound on Jell0’s right side, and reattached her nose cartilage to her upper jaw.

they all loved her immediately — stepped up to save her

~ angels ~ people of exemplary conduct and virtue ~

how do you thank your angels?

with gentle touch soft words of comfort holding life close with a promise we can do this

and we are almost there

*With special thanks to Creighton, Kate, judi, Carolyn and all who have provided special care, thoughts and love to Jello and me as we have navigated this trauma.

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Share this:

In response to The Daily Post’s weekly photo challenge: “Change.”

Share this:

Left photo taken July, 2012 with lupine in full bloom on a sunny afternoon.

Right photo taken September, 2015 with mist rising at daybreak.

Share this:

A week ago, Creighton and I drove from Tahoe City to the summit of Willamette Pass in Oregon. We spent the night at a quiet RV/Cabin resort by Crescent Creek. It was so peaceful and we were tired, so we decided to stay another day and night.

Share this:

“The moment of change is the only poem.” Adrienne Rich

Share this:

with gentle touch
soft words of comfort
holding life close
with a promise
we can do this

and we are
almost there